In fairness to the author, I can appreciate how a non INTJ may view us. It stings, but as an INTJ woman, I can see how we may be misunderstood. Afterall, we have been our whole lives. Quiet confidence may be viewed as a large dose of ego. We will go above and beyond to help someone else, but we will more than likely choose to help on the sly because we want to keep the boundaries in place that protect us from energy sucking requests for more help than we can emotionally sustain. The help must be on our terms. In writing about our need for control, we are guilty as charged if it is referring to controlling our boundaries. Those will be maintained because of our need for peace and order and with knowledge of our limitations. Yes, the appreciation and thanks of others warms the cockles of our hearts and gives us a feeling of self assurance. Perhaps, that is interpreted as superiority.
We also love deeply and want the best for those we love, but because we can quickly see a solution without the complication of emotions, we may either happily spout it out or clam up to give the other person an opportunity to find the answer on their own. Both actions may be misunderstood. The quickness of the solution may be intimidating. Much depends on the delivery which, at times, we don't take the time to think about. We also struggle with waiting for others to figure things out. It wastes so much time. We want to take care of the issue and move on. When we try to fight this tendency, we may get really quiet while we have an internal counseling session which may seem like intolerance or even anger. Nothing could be further from the truth. As the ultimate fixer of problems, we are internally re-calibrating in order to do better next time. We are definitely a complicated personality type.
Debbiesays...
In fairness to the author, I can appreciate how a non INTJ may view us. It stings, but as an INTJ woman, I can see how we may be misunderstood. Afterall, we have been our whole lives. Quiet confidence may be viewed as a large dose of ego. We will go above and beyond to help someone else, but we will more than likely choose to help on the sly because we want to keep the boundaries in place that protect us from energy sucking requests for more help than we can emotionally sustain. The help must be on our terms. In writing about our need for control, we are guilty as charged if it is referring to controlling our boundaries. Those will be maintained because of our need for peace and order and with knowledge of our limitations. Yes, the appreciation and thanks of others warms the cockles of our hearts and gives us a feeling of self assurance. Perhaps, that is interpreted as superiority.
We also love deeply and want the best for those we love, but because we can quickly see a solution without the complication of emotions, we may either happily spout it out or clam up to give the other person an opportunity to find the answer on their own. Both actions may be misunderstood. The quickness of the solution may be intimidating. Much depends on the delivery which, at times, we don't take the time to think about. We also struggle with waiting for others to figure things out. It wastes so much time. We want to take care of the issue and move on. When we try to fight this tendency, we may get really quiet while we have an internal counseling session which may seem like intolerance or even anger. Nothing could be further from the truth. As the ultimate fixer of problems, we are internally re-calibrating in order to do better next time. We are definitely a complicated personality type.