My life and dating as a INTJ-A, and INTJ gone wrong: I was a wierd kid; listening to grown-ups was FAR more interesting than other kids, spent alot of time gaming, learning english to an extreme level, reading books, had a hard time making friends, had a few close ones. Growing up, not even interested in the opposite sex, i first heard "someone thinks you are cute" from a classmate, i didnt even know what to do with that information at that point, but it got me thinking, years later, hitting 17 i had my first girlfriend, basicly a woman hassling about how she thought i was cute and wanted to meet up so we did. Everything was awkward and quirky and didnt last long. - Sex however was fun and interesting. I started actually getting interested in people, i made it my "mission" to learn people,it took somewhat of a wrong turn, i learned how to manipulate people because i knew themselves better than they did, all their emotions could be boiled down and exploited, i could steer and manipulate as i saw fit, getting partners wasnt an issue, neither was throwing them away as i had a hard time making actual and meaningfull connections, more enjoying my "power" over people more than anything., this went on for 10 years or so, a few relationshsips along the way but they all ended within a year. Now that i am older i can reflect back on this, to see how seemingly driven and engaged i can seem and how attractive this can be, how being smart, seeing what makes people get exited and tick has given me a scewed relation to people: Now im older, im hitting 33, been trying to get proper dates and relationships but it is so hard, finding someone who can "understand me" seems like the biggest hurdle, i feel like i am in control, that i cannot let this feeling go away, and a relationship has to be something else... Anyone else had a similar experience and can relate?
Mattias L (not verified)says...
My life and dating as a INTJ-A, and INTJ gone wrong:
I was a wierd kid; listening to grown-ups was FAR more interesting than other kids, spent alot of time gaming, learning english to an extreme level, reading books, had a hard time making friends, had a few close ones.
Growing up, not even interested in the opposite sex, i first heard "someone thinks you are cute" from a classmate, i didnt even know what to do with that information at that point, but it got me thinking, years later, hitting 17 i had my first girlfriend, basicly a woman hassling about how she thought i was cute and wanted to meet up so we did. Everything was awkward and quirky and didnt last long. - Sex however was fun and interesting.
I started actually getting interested in people, i made it my "mission" to learn people,it took somewhat of a wrong turn, i learned how to manipulate people because i knew themselves better than they did, all their emotions could be boiled down and exploited, i could steer and manipulate as i saw fit, getting partners wasnt an issue, neither was throwing them away as i had a hard time making actual and meaningfull connections, more enjoying my "power" over people more than anything., this went on for 10 years or so, a few relationshsips along the way but they all ended within a year.
Now that i am older i can reflect back on this, to see how seemingly driven and engaged i can seem and how attractive this can be, how being smart, seeing what makes people get exited and tick has given me a scewed relation to people:
Now im older, im hitting 33, been trying to get proper dates and relationships but it is so hard, finding someone who can "understand me" seems like the biggest hurdle, i feel like i am in control, that i cannot let this feeling go away, and a relationship has to be something else...
Anyone else had a similar experience and can relate?