"This can lead to problems if, for example, an Intuitive wife forgets her wedding anniversary. She does this because she places greater value on future possibilities than old traditions. Exactness (the date) is not as important to her as the symbol (marriage). To her Sensor husband, however, failing to recognize such an important ritual is disrespectful as it undermines his entire value system."
Whether a person tends to remember or forget, prefers exactness or not, or is considerate of other people or not, has very little to do with being intutive vs. sensor. It has to do with all of the functions combined. Remembering an upcoming wedding anniversary is largely about looking toward the future, because it requires planning if you are to buy a gift or make other special arrangements. As an ENFP, planning - especially anything that has to do with connecting with and making other people feel loved! - is one of my biggest strengths. To this day, I remember anniversaries I had with boyfriends over 25 years ago, and not just major ones either but things like the first time we said "I love you" and such. Things that resonate emotionally are much more likely to be remembered, so if any one function were to be picked out to predict remembering an anniversary, I'd give the edge to feelers. Anything that involves your own and other people's feelings is going to be remembered. And intutive feelers can do this even better, because we'll be much more able to figure out what our mate values even if they don't say it directly.
My ISTP boyfriend and I, who have been together for over a year, are less than a month apart in age, and yet he still couldn't even tell you what month I was born in. Same goes for how long we've been together - he's months off, even though I've reminded him several times, whereas I can remember the exact date and day of the week that we met. He's in the here and now, one thing at a time, so something that's not relevant today isn't very relevant at all. He may be more observent about what's going on around us in terms of factual, physical detail, but anything with an emotional component is likely to be forgotten quickly. My mind can move from past to present to future and in between thought and emotion far more easily. And we're both equally exacting, just about different things.
When it comes to tradition, there's a difference between judgers and perceivers. My ISTP boyfriend has very little interest in or respect for tradition, wereas my ISTJ ex cares about it a lot, and that's typical for each type. They're both sensors, but one is very laid-back, open-minded, flexible, and somewhat messy, whereas the other is more uptight, straight-laced, stubborn, and organized. So while there are many similarities in how I have to communicate to get through to each, there are some methods that would work well for one but ineffectively for the other, and that's with both being introverted sensing thinkers. Throw extroversion and feeling in the mix, and there are far too many variables to come up with any blanket rules for communicating with sensors, except maybe just to try to focus on concrete language and not get too deep into abstractions. Although sometimes they can surprise you with their ability in that area as well, so don't underestimate them.
Strangely Rational (not verified)says...
"This can lead to problems if, for example, an Intuitive wife forgets her wedding anniversary. She does this because she places greater value on future possibilities than old traditions. Exactness (the date) is not as important to her as the symbol (marriage). To her Sensor husband, however, failing to recognize such an important ritual is disrespectful as it undermines his entire value system."
Whether a person tends to remember or forget, prefers exactness or not, or is considerate of other people or not, has very little to do with being intutive vs. sensor. It has to do with all of the functions combined. Remembering an upcoming wedding anniversary is largely about looking toward the future, because it requires planning if you are to buy a gift or make other special arrangements. As an ENFP, planning - especially anything that has to do with connecting with and making other people feel loved! - is one of my biggest strengths. To this day, I remember anniversaries I had with boyfriends over 25 years ago, and not just major ones either but things like the first time we said "I love you" and such. Things that resonate emotionally are much more likely to be remembered, so if any one function were to be picked out to predict remembering an anniversary, I'd give the edge to feelers. Anything that involves your own and other people's feelings is going to be remembered. And intutive feelers can do this even better, because we'll be much more able to figure out what our mate values even if they don't say it directly.
My ISTP boyfriend and I, who have been together for over a year, are less than a month apart in age, and yet he still couldn't even tell you what month I was born in. Same goes for how long we've been together - he's months off, even though I've reminded him several times, whereas I can remember the exact date and day of the week that we met. He's in the here and now, one thing at a time, so something that's not relevant today isn't very relevant at all. He may be more observent about what's going on around us in terms of factual, physical detail, but anything with an emotional component is likely to be forgotten quickly. My mind can move from past to present to future and in between thought and emotion far more easily. And we're both equally exacting, just about different things.
When it comes to tradition, there's a difference between judgers and perceivers. My ISTP boyfriend has very little interest in or respect for tradition, wereas my ISTJ ex cares about it a lot, and that's typical for each type. They're both sensors, but one is very laid-back, open-minded, flexible, and somewhat messy, whereas the other is more uptight, straight-laced, stubborn, and organized. So while there are many similarities in how I have to communicate to get through to each, there are some methods that would work well for one but ineffectively for the other, and that's with both being introverted sensing thinkers. Throw extroversion and feeling in the mix, and there are far too many variables to come up with any blanket rules for communicating with sensors, except maybe just to try to focus on concrete language and not get too deep into abstractions. Although sometimes they can surprise you with their ability in that area as well, so don't underestimate them.